Monday, August 11, 2008

To sell or not to sell???

You know you are living the typical sales life when:

  1. Chai becomes your breakfast and lunch…and at times dinner too
  2. U do not like setting up your room, most of your stuff is always in the suitcase
  3. You start analyzing each and every statement that another person makes and your mind goes : whats there in it for him and whats there in it for me…
  4. Every interaction is viewed as a negotiation, you always want to win the bargain and the win could be as petty as saving a couple of bucks by bargaining with the auto rickshaw guy – many times the big picture is lost.
  5. Cuss words are used as often as punctuation breaks or maybe even more.
  6. Lying comes naturally to you – your boss thinks you are in the market talking to the retailers; the retailers think you are in the office in some important meeting; truth is you are sleeping till 11 in the morning. Obviously that is not what you tell when you get a call from anyone.
  7. Your eating habits become like how a camel stores water: infrequent bursts of heavy eating and food is stored before next meal which comes after a long longggggg time
  8. If you do not smoke it becomes difficult to start a conversation.
  9. You start believing that sales is the only function which does some actual work, all the other function people are cooling their asses in air-conditioned rooms!
  10. You understand that there are somethings which you should never speak about; like never ask a distributor ki sahab business kaisa hai because invariably he will start with his long list of complaints and you will be left nodding your head for the next hour…. Also never tell a retailer ki sahab kuch madad chahie; he will eat off your brains asking for more discounts and offers.
  11. You would not necessarily lose sleep if you girlfriend ditches you for some other guy, but not achieving targets would surely give you sleepless nights…and if you do manage to reach your targets or cross them comfortably you will think that you are the king of the world though deep down you know how much role you had in actually making those high sales figures…your achieving targets does not have any correlation to the amount of work you put in, there is some extraneous factor(s) which is calling the shots – basically the concept of invisible hand.

6 comments:

Atul said...

hope ur dad reads this blog.
i want to see his comments!!

Dilip Menda said...

blog strictly prohibited for family audiences :)

nefariousoutlook said...

sahi hai beta..looks like you are really enjoynig your work..agree with most of what you said :)

Anonymous said...

Kutte, saara trade secret public domain mein daal diya [:D]. Now, your boss knows what to do with you :D!
Very nice one.
Sagar

An idle mind's wasted lines... said...

True...true....so true.... that even this seems like a lie...
Menda strikes again... good one!

sneha said...

hey ...very interesting .......as most of it is quite true.........this onli a businessman or a salesperson can understand